Memorial Service
Josiah's Memorial Service:
The song Oceans by Hillsong leads us to sing a very dangerous yet essential anthem:
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior”
We are asking the Spirit of God to lead us where we cannot make it on our own. We are asking God to lead us to places where we must have faith in His provision and power. God has led us all through Josiah’s terminal brain cancer. We have tread upon waters because there is no cure and only a miracle of God would have saved him. There was no solid ground in which to walk. Through these past 13 months, our faith has been tested. Our faith has been strained. And I believe our faith can now blossom because God has never left us. Josiah’s journey here has ended in the arms of Jesus.
Josiah had the first biopsy in this area of the brain ever done at Children’s National Hospital. Josiah led us through an impossible path. No one can walk on water without God. Josiah had the type of faith that could move a mountain. I caught this moment the night before Josiah’s brain biopsy telling a story to Becket to ease the fear of his little brother:
“There was a man who fell. He fell in an elevator and the elevator door closed on his foot. He screamed. All of the doctors came around but they could not open the elevator. So he broke his foot. But the next day something worse happened.”
“What?” Becket asked.
“He had to get foot surgery,” Josiah replied.
“So he had to wake up at…” But Becket interrupts, “Did he have a foot?”
Undaunted Josiah says “Yes. He had his foot still. He had his foot, yes.” Josiah continued to increase the emergency in his tone, “Then he had to wake up so early in the morning. You see he was to be there before the sun rises. You see it was so early he fell asleep in the car going to the hospital. And then, guess what? A miracle happened. His foot was healed all of a sudden. It was just poof and he could walk again. He could do good stuff again.”
Josiah pauses then proclaims triumphantly, “And that is what is going to happen to me! Just not in that way.” He laughs and smiles a big smile reassuring his little brother by His faith in a mighty, miracle-working God.
Josiah believed in a God of miracles. We knew and prayed as a family that God would remove this tumor. We prayed numerous times throughout the 13 months. We expected, along with him, that a miracle “would happen to me!” The question asked most often by Josiah was not if God would heal him, but why it had taken so long.
Our journey of walking across the water became a long one. Josiah quickly lost the ability to fully use his left arm and leg. The tumor could not be seen but the evidence of its destruction was obvious. He had a choice to make in his journey. One he had to make many, many times. Did he go into hiding? Did he sit in the corner and hide from the world. Or did he keep on living?
The video showed that he did not run away from the world but battled alongside many of you for he was strong. He went to swim practice every day with the team. He could not compete. But he led the team by doing all the laps with one good pull followed by the flopping of his other arm. Again and again and again.
Throughout the Bible, you will read God encouraging us to “Be strong and courageous”. We do not need to fear the powers that are against us. We are to take courage and confidence to move forward because we trust that God is for us. Being strong and courageous battling this disease had many twists and turns. Just going to school or gym class where he could not do what everyone else could do was courageous. The following clip shows a moment of courage that still inspires me today:
Josiah had an injection of a vaccine that took between 5 to 7 seconds to push in which was followed up by another deep shot for an immune booster. He received those shots every 3 weeks for 6 months. He never ever complained about the pain or the markings they left on his body. He never once said he did not want to go. He hated needles just like the rest of us. But he knew what he needed to do for his part of this walk across the water. He was always strong and courageous.
Josiah knew he was not alone in this fight. Thousands joined us in praying to our powerful, capable, and loving God to heal my son. He enjoyed time with classmates, friends, and family. Even though he hated how the steroids devastated his six-pack and pecs, he would not hide. The video was from a Sunday night at the Pittsburgh hotel. He proclaimed to his friends and family that this video was for them. He quickly limped to the edge of the pool, took a deep breath, and jumped. “Yeeehh!” He splashed and made a quick return back to the top of the water. After a little coughing, he assured me “I’m alright.” Then flashed his million-dollar grin and chuckled.
The Bible states in Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” He was a friend to many. He wanted those who were struggling with him to know, he still had a joy that cancer could never touch. He shared that joy with all of us. We are making a coin that will help remind us of Josiah’s journey and the lessons he taught us. Please make sure you sign up after the service or hit the link in the email I sent so that we know where to send the coin.
Finally, let me show you the source of Josiah’s strength and courage that enabled him to live in the midst of dying.
The cross.
I placed this cross in his hand during his last 24 hours. He held onto it tightly as he fought his way to the end of his journey. The cross is where we have learned what love is. The cross is where the one who healed many, went Himself to die. He sacrificed his life that we may live… that we may have access to the Father’s arms. God who created all things and can do all things, could have made the path of faith and righteousness a different way. It did not have to be with a crucifixion… the most horrible of deaths. But He did. It is a great mystery of God. I do not know why God allowed Josiah to die. I know that He heard our prayers. I know He did not want Josiah to die. God could have had Josiah’s journey here end some other way. It is a mystery to us.
This is where our journey continues to walk across these waters without Josiah. Our last prayers to Josiah were that he would run, jump and embrace the arms of Jesus. Josiah showed us the way. The mysterious ways of God are beyond us. But I know this: Josiah knows the answer to these mysteries. And someday he will share the mystery of the cross and the mystery of his journey to me… in person.
I long for that day.