Parents and gratitude
“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks
in all circumstances”
There are many unsung heroes in Josiah’s journey with DIPG. There are so many stories that could be told but I cannot highlight them all. What I must emphasize in the midst of all these stories and memories is the importance of gratitude.
On November 14, 2015 I wrote about Josiah’s extreme bouts of nausea. There were no huge hurdles to overcome. There was definitely a lull in our lives. But in-between the insanity of pediatric cancer, the lulls came take you under just the same. He was prescribed Zofran which changed our lives from that day forth. The drug made a difference quickly and I wrote, “Thankfully he has been able to drink and even eat a little something today. Thankful.”
I described going back to Pittsburgh at the end of the week. I did not have to drive because Angel Flight volunteers would fly us there and back. I wrote, “So thankful.”
I gave everyone the heads up about our Make-A-Wish trip. Josiah was able to custom create T-shirts for us all. The shirts were bright yellow with a unique collection of clip art. Becket and Josiah loved them. I explained, “We will stand out for sure. Becket has worn the shirt for the last three days. So fun and so thankful.”
Then I focused on Bob and Rita:
Finally, none of the above can compare to the gratitude I have for my parents. They have been living with me since the middle of August. Each school day they prep the kids for school and pick them all up at the end of the day. They are here to pick up, assist, and care for Josiah as he hasn’t yet had a full day of school. They are both a present and positive influence for all my children. They have sacrificed their entire Fall making it possible to care for Josiah with two single parents working full time. I cannot begin to imagine how I could ever repay them for their loving sacrifice. They are a living, breathing example of God’s grace to me and my family. I could not be more blessed by God to be given such wonderful parents.
My parents were some of the rocks that made my foundation as I fought with my son against DIPG. They were an integral part of Josiah’s Journey who made an impossible situation possible. My mom had recently retired and was looking forward to a time of rest. But they both quickly changed their plans and came to live with us. They uprooted their lives for almost five months to love and care for us. Proving, once again, parenting is not simply a birth to high school graduation deal.
When I am asked for the most important thing that got me through the most challenging years of my life, I say gratitude. No hesitation, no questioning the most powerful thing that moved me forward was and is still today gratitude. Choosing to take my eyes off what I cannot control and placing them on what had already been provided. I never backed away from calling horrible things the horrible things they were. But choosing to plant my feet on goodness rather than chaos allowed me to stand and be present for my family.
The apostle Paul writes an encouraging letter to one of the first Christian churches on the planet located in Thessalonica which is in modern day Greece. At the end of the letter he writes a description of “God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”. It is a list of three great admonitions: “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thessalonians 5:17,18)
Many days with tears filling my eyes, I would begin to look around. Overwhelmed with the current circumstance, I would start with the physical surroundings. I would thank God for the sun rise. Or thank God for the rain that fed the plants. I would thank God for my home. I would thank God for a car that I could count on to take me to work or their school. I would thank God for His provision of a job. Not just a job but direct ministry to others that I could share His love. And on and on...
As I said then I still mean it today:
Thank you all for following Josiah’s journey. It means a lot to us all that you are with us in so many ways. Thank you for being by our side in this battle with cancer.
I was thankful to know that I was never alone. Gratitude gave me the ability to connect to God’s goodness. I could feel the connection to the presence of God in prayer. On the best of days, I could rejoice in what God was doing and what He would do.
I encourage you to begin each day with gratitude. Find something, anything to give thanks for. It does not have to be big or even specific to the day. Or it can be just the first thing you lay your eyes upon.
The power of gratitude is not about the object but your persective. We stop trying to conform reality to what we want and confess the reality of what is. For what is will always be bigger than what we can fathom. We begin to have eyes to see the world as the gift it is. We see ourselves as receiving more than we even knew to ask for.
I find it best to begin “small”. A heart beat. A breath. The sun shedding it’s light. A room to keeping the rain off our heads. Ears to hear a bird sing. A nose to smell a fresh pot of coffee. We have been given so very much. God is good to us. Begin again here.
There is much more to say… Gratitude gave me eyes to see the God I could not understand. Gratitude allows me to seek Him continually. Gratitude makes a way to find joy in the midst of the darkness.